


Fella

by bythedamned



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Drabble, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Modern Era, Period-Typical Homophobia, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Stucky - Freeform, steve and bucky against the world
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-27 07:11:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15680523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bythedamned/pseuds/bythedamned
Summary: Steve and Bucky have been deeply closeted out of fear since the 1930s, with no intent to change that. But when Bucky gasps out of an unconscious fugue state and outs them, Steve is ready to watch this place burn rather than let the team harm either of them.





	Fella

The Winter Soldier died six weeks ago, officially. Unofficially – Bucky, Steve told them, his name was Bucky – has been making the rounds, submitting himself to half-day interogations and awkward introductions at every coffee break and elevator ride. In Steve’s rooms he’d gradually slid into this steady state of cautious ease, signaled by his willingness to mess with the radio presets, flush the toilet while Steve is in the shower, and the occasional – occasional – bout of affection. Steve considered, briefly, moving them elsewhere, South America maybe, or Scandinavia, but the doctors here are too good, and Bucky’s classification as ‘alive and well’ is too much of a wild card, still. 

Precision weapons aren’t made for continuous use, though, and Bucky was conditioned for sprints – three day international sprees – not this slow-grind death by a thousand pointed questions, punctuated by thrashing nights and memory-migraines. His body had met the turn of the century with a final lurch and slow slide into 2015, and the day Steve found Bucky collapsed in the hallway, chest convulsing but metal arm locked into a contorted twist, was the new worst day of his life. 

So now Buck’s unconscious on an IV drip and they’re hoping he’s gonna come out of it but he might not. Might not. Each day the doctors have a new angle, a new maybe, but each petal of hope has been plucked and discarded, a twisted game of he loves me, he loves me not, he might live, he might not, and there’s no telling how many petals the doctors have, they don’t know – don’t even know – and he might live, he might not, they’re trying something new, but—

Steve’s hovering, the team’s hovering, and everyone says, don’t worry man, he’ll make it, because they’re sympathetic, to Steve, but not Bucky, to them Bucky’s just this guy, the new guy in the revolving door of new guys. This guy-slash-potential-threat, this newest, shiniest thing that makes Steve absolutely 100% irrational and maybe, they whisper, a little obsessed. They say it’s the war, the trauma, they don’t know, they weren’t there, this is just how people were back then, _back then_ like it’s some alien planet, some alternate universe where poverty meant devotion and they—

They don’t know, can never know, that he’n’Buck almost ran for Canada because Steve’s 4F couldn’t follow Buck to training and they hadn’t been apart since Steve was drawing a valentine’s card to sell for grocery money. Bucky’d found it and thought Steve had finally come clean, and Steve shook his head, denied it, all, what? and no? but Bucky was “what? yes” and then Steve was absolutely 100% yes. Steve was yes on every surface of that sun-warped apartment – the bed (that didn’t creak) and the tub and the window sill (the blinds drawn) and the counter and pushed against the front door (with Bucky’s hand clamped over his mouth because they couldn’t, couldn’t, be heard). They were silent in Red Hook, and Flatbush, and then in Italy, and France and in the Officer’s quarters on the western front, and literally every single place Bucky pressed his fingertips, his teeth, into Steve’s skin, because he couldn’t bruise anymore, wouldn’t be sore in the morning, but he still wanted to feel devoured, overwhelmed, _owned_ , and —

And they can never know, it’s not safe, even now, with reports of marriage and riots and equality and boys with their gutted bodies hanging off chain link fences, and even in New York, the city that’s come so far, so long, but is still built from the same bricks and mud and—

And Steve quietly panics under the watchful eyes of his team. Panics and prays and apologizes for being silent for 75 years but he’s praying now and if God would just bring Bucky back— until he does, until Bucky’s up and gasping, looking fine, looking whole, and Steve is there, of course he’s there, right there, and so is everyone else but a hundred cycles of cryo and torture have not been kind to Bucky’s mind, and he’s disoriented, grabbing at Steve, hauling him in and kissing him and thanking his lucky stars the Germans are too fucking dumb to track them through the trees and—

Steve can do this. He’s only caught up for a moment before he knows what’s happened, sees what Bucky’s done, what he’s cost them, what Steve’s cost them by letting them end up here in the first place and he thinks – that’s ok. He can do this. He’ll be damned if they’re gonna gut him, lay one red finger on Buck, because he knows their tells, knows their tricks, and they may be aliens and monster and spies but he is Captain Goddamn America and let it never be said that he went down without a fight. He will take them out, out with breath to spare, take down even Thor, because Bucky is alive, and his, and that’s the only thing he prayed for, the only thing he needs to be okay in this strange, frigid, digital world, and he will give up his command, the team, he doesn’t need them, can only promise he won’t hurt, maim, kill them, so long as he and Bucky make it out of here, safe, away and together—

When he stands up, the room is empty. They’re surrounded by medical equipment and half-drawn blinds, the hum and beep of a monitor keeping time for them and them alone, and Steve gestures for Buck’s silence while he runs interference because it isn’t safe, there’s hostiles – four – and Steve will handle it, just give him a second, they’ll be okay, just let him handle it, he can do this. He creeps out of the med suite to the sound of excited murmurs, distracted sounds, just his luck he’s got surprise on his side, but then Bruce is calmly listing the virtues of discretion and Pepper interrupts about something called Sensitivity Training and “you’ll have to take it twice, Tony”, and Tony grunts and grumbles but otherwise doesn’t move until Thor turns toward the open door and grins with his arms thrown wide. He beckons Steve in, congratulates him on the waking of his beloved warrior and Romanoff comes over to put a hand on his shoulder and he’s stock still, rigid, forgot to breathe, can’t breathe, but she just smiles, a real one, and says “you’re gonna have to introduce us to your fella properly this time,” and then her eyes are off him, over his shoulder, somewhere unknown but it is known, _he_ is known, because he is Bucky, behind him, there, exposed, his eyes flitting wildly like the indecision is a visible thing that’s taken flight. He says “we okay?”, raspy, and somehow he’s holding a knife, of course, of course he is – his socks, Steve, did you check his socks? – and Steve has to think, checks this moment against reality, ‘cause he’s not sure, he didn’t think, but Pepper is blushing behind Thor and Bruce and Natasha are nodding encouragingly and Tony can’t make eye contact but then he never can and, and—

“Yeah, Buck”, he says, slowly, testing the words, because God this strange future is confusing but maybe that’s okay, something they can work with, truly a whole new world, ‘cause who could have guessed, who, and he would’ve drowned himself a hundred times over if he’d known that he could just, just have this. Have this, here, with his team, his friends and his, his – fella. “Yeah, we’re okay. Guys,” he says, turning stiffly, but he’s got a hand on Bucky, pulling him up, flush to his side, Buck equally tense but willing, and no one’s expression changes, no one shifts for a weapon and Steve says, “guys, you’ve met Bucky, my, uh, my—”

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time posting since 2012, which is a loooong hiatus. It's good to be back.


End file.
